Parents and members of the community don’t normally take notice of the details of policies and practices until they impact them personally. The fact that parents and members of the community with transgender or gender dysphoric children are so loudly supportive of the current policy is a great example. They became familiar with a policy that impacts them directly, find it acceptable for their needs, and they do not want to see it change, even if that change is designed to broaden the policy and consider the needs of all students and their families. Many parents that have not been directly impacted by 443 or were unaware of its provisions have now become familiar with it and are concerned that it does not fully meet their needs, particularly, but not exclusively, about the absence of parental notification and the use of bathrooms. It’s safe to say many parents have attended public board and committee meetings and have asked questions and expressed those concerns.

Many parents and community members also come to us with these concerns as well and express them in far more detail in our meetings than they can in 3 minutes at a BOE meeting or in an email. On the topic of 443, most of these parents do not have any issue with the welcoming environment that FCPS seeks and deeply love their children. Still, they have a genuine concern about the current policy’s provisions to keep that information from them if the child indicates they do not want the family to know about it. This concern became more real to them when FCPS had to take action to reconsider a gap in their procedures that inadvertently notified a family about their child’s gender choice. The situation was discussed publicly by the board and was described as an FCPS emergency call that inadvertently used a non-biological pronoun in reference to the student that the family was unaware was in use. FCPS felt that the notification gap had to be closed, alerting parents.

Parents have tried to get the board to listen at public meetings but are still frustrated, commenting that they not only want to know about their child’s choices but feel their daughters are being placed at risk and being denied a right to privacy by a policy that permits biological boys to share bathrooms and changing rooms with their daughters. They find the board’s stated concern over making transgender students feel stigmatized by using single occupancy rooms has trumped any concern they have for the risk and trauma their children may experience by being denied that lack of privacy.

The BOE may have a sense that this reaction from parents is new or that those expressing concern are a few loud voices of intolerance, but that is not who we’re hearing from. Programs like Transparency in Education are explaining to families that Policy 443, while well-intentioned, can have an impact on them in a way they may not have realized, and they are seeking changes that keep them aware about their children and their gender concerns. One telling critique came from someone that commented that our proposal is unnecessary because no parent of gender non-conforming or transgender students or the FCPS requested our support, implying that the portion of the community that does not fit into these categories should not be heard. We disagree. We believe these parents deserve representation in the revised policy as well.

The proposal we submitted represents the most accurate medical and scientific data and research available, which are open for others to refute with counter studies that the board can consider together. We also provided information on the underlying and growing risk of legal exposure as cases involving parental rights under the 14th amendment are still in review or pending appeal. The Virginia House recently passed a bill requiring parental notification that has now been forwarded to the committee in the Senate (SB2432).

The policy also lays out the case that parents are in the best position to fully assess their child’s medical and developmental needs in full, with the cooperation, not the exclusion of, the school. Allowing schools to affirm a child’s gender choice without the knowledge or involvement of families is a narrow-minded approach that can result in actual harm to the minor child and families,

Our goal is simply to recognize the rights of all parents and families and to follow the most recent scientific evidence that describes the most effective and helpful handling of the topic.

Here are the arguments against the proposal and why we think they are misguided.